First day of college

So today was my first day of my second year at rock valley.

I don’t really know how I feel. I feel so frustrated, awkward, and Just really uncomfortable because I don’t really know anyone. I Just get a really bad feeling inside me. I don’t really know anyone I feel like everyone is looking at me Judging me.

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I hate this feeling. I feel like I really don’t have anyone to walk to right now so IM Just writing my feelings out. It Just feel so weird to see some of my highlights colleagues around campus. I Just want a new start where no one knows me so no one can Judge me cause they don’t really know me.Wow I feel like I wrote a lot but not really.

I don’t really get why I keep putting makeup on, does It keep growing my insecurities. Can I change myself for the better? Why am I not motivated as before? How can I motivate myself and still feel secure about myself? Aim so frustrated and fed up with my life, Just try to act calm Inferno of everyone cause I find myself weird for being like this? Does this really set me apart from others? Why do make fun of other people, when I know what It feels like? Why and how do I know lam becoming what I want to be truly for the better?