Kids who were raised by disciplinary parents are 85% more likely to do better in school than kids who weren’t and even more successful in life.(Pipher) There is much confusion about the term discipline. “Discipline is the practice of training kids to obey rules of behavior, using punishment to correct disobedience.”(Google Dictionary) By disciplining your kids, it shows that you care and want better for your kids. Disciplinarian parents are beneficial for children because they teach them self-control, independence, and responsibility. It also helps the parents because all kids are not the same and it helps the parents best figure out how their kids through discipline.
Self-control is taught through discipline and keeping everything consistent so kids get into a habit and know that if they did something wrong there will be consequences for their actions. Kids will eventually learn self-control by resisting distractions, controlling emotions, and prevent some impulse decisions. When parents teach their kids boundaries and give them limits, it shows the kids that they have rules to follow and they can’t do whatever they want. “Strict parents set boundaries and enforce limits, children learn self-control.” (Zagata) Many parents feel to control their kids’ behavior and actions they have to punish their kids. 78% agree with this statement but they don’t always follow through.(Marc Fisher) Some said that they do punish but sometimes let it slide. You have to keep the punishment all consistent so that the kids know something is going to happen if they behave wrongly.
Being consistent with discipline makes it easier for the kids to catch on and learn that there are consequences for your actions. “Parents who are consistent with discipline teaches kids that there are consequences for actions.” (Zagata) The 78% that said they agreed with that statement also believed that kids need to be fearful of their parents. That doesn’t mean the kind of fear like “afraid of”, it’s a healthy fear of respect, so they grow up to be law-abiding adults. Punishment and disciplining doesn’t mean abusing kids, it just means taking away privileges, groundings, spankings, while using a stern voice to get the point across.
You are not supposed to be your kids’ friend, there is time for that when they are adults. “You’d rather be your child’s friend than an authority figure” (Marc Fisher) Why do you want to be friends with your kids, that right there is a mistake? By being your kids’ friend they’re not learning anything on behavior. Then when it’s time for you to be a parent they will have no respect for you. Being the authority figure is what’s better for both the kid and the parent. They will have respect for you and they won’t run all over you. It is your job to be authoritative and teach them right from wrong. 86% of kids said that they learned more about how to be responsible and be independent when they grew up in a household where they were disciplined. (Pipher) These kids who are now adults talked about how back then they didn’t like being punished and getting things taken away, but what kid does enjoys that? They respect their parents and are glad their parents did that because now are able to be independent and do things for themselves the right way.
If you punish your kids and try and keep them on the right track, doesn’t mean that your kids will be perfect and always listen, it’s just a learning process for them so that eventually when they get older they will know how to act and be mindful of what they should and shouldn’t do. Kids aren’t going to start out hard-working, obeying, listening; you have to teach them to be all those things. Don’t expect that they will just figure it all out; parents should help guide them to be all those things. By giving them want they want, they won’t learn and will stay the way they are. “They’re set up to be narcissistic, spoiled, not inclined to work hard, and with impulse-control problems.
” (Pipher) Most everything they learn will be from you the parent. It’s like a job, however much work you put into it is what you’ll get out from it. If you keep up will discipline and show them that you are the boss then they will grow up to be great young adults, but of course there will be bumps in the road. No one said it would be easy. Parents who care about their kids try and get them out there in the “real world” when they are old enough so that they get a feel for what it’s like and get that experience sooner so they know what it’s like to be independent and held accountable for themselves and have that responsibility, rather than wait till they are moving out and get bombarded and struggling, they get everything figured out sooner so that can be even more successful later on. “They learn the value of money and the importance of earning it at a young age, which can help them be financially successful later in life.
“(Zagata) A lot of parents talk about how they don’t like to use the word “No” because when kids hear no they get angry and mad at their parents, but those parents don’t understand the power of no. Start now with teaching them that no means no and don’t cave in because then, later on, they will start to run over you so that they get what they want. ‘”Start today with no means no.”‘ (Pipher) When kids hear the word no they need to know that it means no and only no.
If you say no but then give in they will expect you to give in every time and they will lose the respect that they have for you. This goes along with being consistent with your punishments and keeping it the same. Kids’ behavior is more out of control these days because most households have both parents working and the lack of time with the kids and not wanting to be “the bad guy” always disciplining, leads to “lazy parenting” and giving into the child’s demands. With today’s issues, many kids are developing anti-social behavioral problems. This occurs in nearly 10% of children between the ages 5-15.(Zagata) This is caused when parents don’t give their children the type of discipline they need and exclude them from social interaction. Sometimes, parents excuse their child’s behavior, which can cause them to develop anger issues, and other behavioral issues. While some behavioral issues are hereditary, some behavioral issues, like ODD are caused by the environment in which the child lives in.
While this isn’t the main cause, it certainly attributes to it. If parents are very lenient on their child’s behavior, then the child will think that can do whatever they want, and if they don’t get their way, then there is a huge tantrum. This only gets worse as the child grows older. When the child grows up and gets to the real world and has had no discipline they don’t get their way in so, if something, then they will end up being a really snobby person who is selfish.
If our new generation wants to be known as hardworking and successful, then we need to stop letting children get their way all of the time. Sometimes, as new parents, when you discipline your kid and they are crying, it is hard to watch. The parents will feel empathy and feel bad for disciplining their child. That isn’t good because the child quickly will learn that they can get away with anything.Most parents these days simply don’t care what their kids do. This is the reason why many girls end up pregnant as teens, and why there are many high school dropouts, and increased amount of kids in jail, or doing drugs. This happens especially at school.
Teens are constantly pressured to give in, to do drugs or to drink. Some parents don’t care, and let their child do whatever they want. Then you have parents complaining to the school and yelling the teachers, asking why their child is receiving an F in the class. Turns out, their child was partying the night before, and didn’t care about their grades, so they felt no need to study.
Parents blame the education system for failing their kids, which only encourages their children to keep doing it. Then, when their child gets in trouble at school, the child doesn’t worry about it because their parents aren’t going to care, they will only complain to the school and cause more drama. Some parents, says John Randall, a guidance counselor at Richard Montgomery High School in Rockville, know their children need limits but are incapable of imposing them. “They come to us pleading for help, but it’s not, ‘Teach me how to manage my child,’ it’s, ‘You manage my child.'” (Marc Fisher) Some parents want their kids to behave the right way but don’t know how and just expect someone else to raise them and teach them. You have to put in the time to teach them. It’s not that you can’t have help or want help, its that you are asking some else to do it for you and you’re not putting in the time to do it yourself or you just give up and want someone do it for you instead of asking for help and have someone guide you. The kids should know better but how can they if the parents just don’t care.
The kids can’t know any better if they were never taught how to act. You hate these kinds of kids because they get on your nerves but when you think about it, it all goes back to how the parents raised the kids. “As a society, we not only seek to punish “bad” kids but to find the parents who produced them and hold those adults responsible” (Marc Fisher) This only fuels the flames, and tempts the child to test the limits, to see how far they can get without getting in trouble. If parents aren’t showing their kids what happens when they mess up, they will continue to do it more, because they know their parents aren’t going to care. What makes it worse is when parents engage in it with their child, such as buying their child alcohol to drink. “Kids are going to drink anyway, so they might as well do it at home, under adult supervision. Restricting teenagers makes no sense when they’ll be on their own in college soon enough”.
(Marc Fisher) Yes, he has a point but that doesn’t mean that it has to be that way. If you just let them do that then your gonna have your kid living in your basement because you showed them that you don’t care if they drink and if they know that then why go anywhere when you the parents are supplying the alcohol for them, they have want they want now and you just gave it to them thinking you were helping them but your promoting it. Yes, I understand that if you are watching them then they can’t leave and go drive off and get hurt but you can’t do everything for them they do have to learn from mistakes. Plus you teach them right from wrong and you try your best to prevent bad things from happening but you can’t save them from everything. You don’t want to be too overprotective that they can’t do anything for themselves. By giving them alcohol, that is like handing them a gun and expecting them to not shoot it.
If a parent is letting them drink, when they get to college, it is only going to get worse. Believe it or not, there are high school kids who have liver and kidney failure because they drink so much. None of that would have happened, had the parent not let their kid drink.
Some parents these days are just reckless, and see no use in disciplining their child because they “want them to enjoy life” or “to not be mad at them all the time”. Well, life just isn’t fair and sometimes getting your phone taken away for a week doesn’t seem so bad when compared to winding up a high school dropout, unable to pursue a college career to do something you want to do, all because your parents didn’t push you hard enough in school. If parents don’t play and active role in their child’s life, and not disciplining their children when they are young, when those children grow up, they are going to raise their children the exact same way. People are so surprised that our generation is lazy and doesn’t do anything. Yes, part of that is on the child for not doing their work on time, but it also the parents’ fault as well. Everyone is so quick to blame the child, but not the parents. If the parents aren’t pushing their child to get good grades, that child isn’t going to be motivated to push their goals and be successful.
Teaching kids to work hard and teaching them that not everything is just going to be handed to them is a very important lesson that all parents should be teaching. That goes along with teaching discipline.In conclusion, disciplining kids is an absolute must when raising kids. When parents use discipline on children it has an major overall effect on the way they act while growing up and in their adult life.
Disciplinarian parents are beneficial for children because they teach them self-control, independence, and responsibility. By teaching kids good habits at a young age, they are more likely to have a better and brighter future. Some people think that disciplining kids at a young age is bad for them, but those parents are toxic, and are afraid to discipline their kids.